#Cause calling that out like that would terrify me lol
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i-may-be-an-emu · 3 days ago
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One of my favourite moments from Jingle Boys :)
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depresseddepot · 4 months ago
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I am once again ridiculously fucking early for my movie (which is confusing to me bc I've been to this theater before and you ALWAYS need to get there early) but I got alcohol this time so I am very excited to chill and rewatch alien romulus and take notes and read subtitles
#the theater is literally reserved for me and three other people lmao#i was the first one so i also got to pretend and see what it would be like to sit right in the front row#i think it would be bad because it would hurt my neck something awful#and i was debating between the seat i have now and the row in front of me but row in front of me isn't lifted like the rest of them#so i successfully got the EXACT seat i wanted#i thought id be terrified to go to movies by myself bc i absolutely cannot eat at a restaurant by myself#but when the lights turn off its actually very relaxing#nobody can hear me bc its loud (not that im saying or doing anything) and nobody can see me bc its dark#plus i get yummy popcorn :) and at this fancy place i can get alcohol too which i am already starting to feel lmao#I'm hoping it won't make me have to pee because i genuinely like every scene in this movie so i can't like. pick the worst one to pee durin#also i heard rumors that they played a trailer of alien: earth during the alien romulus pre.....ads or whatever they're called#but i didnt see it at the local theater so I'm interested to see if theyll do it here#im here by myself so i don't have anyone to yap to so im yapping in this post LMAO#also i was nervous but im always so much less nervous than when im with friends even if im super comfortable with them#why is that???? is it just cause i can bail if i freak out too much on my own or what#anyway lol#UPDATE: THE PEOPLE WHO RESERVES SEATS LITERALLY DIDN'T SHOW#LETS FUCKING GOOOO IM THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS WHOLE THEATER#i can actually RELAX brother YESS
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iloveelliefanfics · 9 days ago
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um... wuhluhwuh?
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a/n: tlou has been kicking in (for almost 2 years now lol) ellies been on my mind forever now, whenever i feel like i need a break i just play tlou (so many of you can relate probably) so enjoy this slow burn with awkward jackson ellie x awkward reader! PLEASE I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO NAME THIS FIC, took me way too long to write this😞 excuse me for it
part II
summary: you and ellie had been friends for months now, you clicked right away. you have so many similarities and you go on patrol together. lately she's been way more awkward around you and it makes you question things between you two. both of you have a secret crush on each other
pairing: awkward jackson ellie x awkward reader
it's full of fluff, ellie being her cute, nerdy self. also idk if i should write part 2 lemme know if y'all want it!
pics r from my gameplay and from pinterest
proofread!
the first couple of months
When you first arrived in Jackson you didn't know if you'd ever find someone. A friend. You spent months outside, alone and terrified. Finding a place where you could rest, eat, shower, call it a home. Man, that was something you didn't know still existed. Finding Jackson was a miracle. Finding a home was one too. An unexpected one. In the first couple of days you were so lost, you were only able to sleep and eat after being so exhausted of traveling for months not staying anywhere for too long, it was way too dangerous.
The town was beautiful. Usually when the sun was setting the town was lightened up with gorgeous lights, you loved walking around and just take it all in. You started to feel comfortable and when you were finally able to take part in patrol and help the town it was more than good. You kind of missed going out. After a month of staying in town and getting to call this place your home, you found some cool people and you started to hang out with them. It was fun and all but you still didn't feel like you actually had friends. You were here and there but sometimes you still felt lonely and out of place. In the group there was this one girl though. Her name was Dina. She introduced you to a lot of people, she taught you some skills that would come in handy.
In exchange, you became good friends with her and you spent a lot of time with her. You also taught her many things that you had learned on your own when you were out there. She was super nice to you from the beginning, it was no surprise you became friends with her so fast, gosh you wished you had met her sooner. She's also mentioned a friend of hers, Ellie. She said it many times when you were just chilling and hanging out at her place how the two of you would get along really well, she wanted you two to meet. It was almost crazy cause you never actually saw Ellie no matter how many times or how long you were hanging out with Dina. One day she convinced you to go over to her place so she brought you to her garage, it was behind a house, if you were correct it was Joel's house. You didn't know much about either Joel nor Ellie but that was about to change.
Dina knocked on Ellie's door, you didn't know what to expect. Dina mentioned Ellie knows she wants her to meet someone new, you had a knot in your stomach from how anxious you were. Ellie opened her door, first noticing you then Dina.
"Hey Ellie!" Dina greeted her with a big smile then hugged her.
"Hi...!" There was an awkward pause before she greeted you and Dina. As she was hugging Dina, she kept looking at you. You waited for your turn to greet her and tell her your name. Dina pulled back from the hug letting you two greet each other.
"Uhm hi..!" You greet her in the same awkward tone, she did before, you're not sure what to say or do so you turn to Dina for some help.
Dina laughs and gives you a nudge towards Ellie. “Cmon you weirdos, talk to each other!” Dina says jokingly, turning to you and Ellie.
Ellie's just fidgeting with her fingers not knowing what to say to you, she's even barely looking at you at this point so you take the situation in your hands.
"I'm Y/N, it's very nice to meet you" You try to go over your anxiety and smile at her. She gives you an awkward smile.
"I'm Ellie, heard a lot about you" She says, still fidgeting with her fingers. Dina just stands there trying to figure out where all of this is gonna go.
And that's how you two met. Very awkward, and weird at first. The three of you started hanging out after you and Ellie had met. Sometimes you even hung out just the two of you. You'd become inseparable with Ellie, always going to the lake, exploring different areas, sneaking out at night, bringing gifts to each other from patrols when you weren't assigned together... Before you got assigned with her for a patrol.
the first patrol together
This day has arrived. The first ever patrol together with her. With Ellie. You were excited for this day, not expecting much, go out, go to your assigned place, clear it if it has any infected, sign in, go back to town. Easy for you. And with Ellie who had gone across the entire country at the age of 14. It seemed like going on a tea party in the afternoon.
It was early morning, you woke up to the noise of birds chirping, Ellie and you agreed on meeting at the stables. You had been thinking of her for a while now. Were you actually thinking of her as a friend? Had it been more? Could it be more? You don't know. Everything felt natural when you were around her, she made you laugh so easily, she made you smile on your gloomiest days. You love her, you know that for sure, but was that love in the friend category? As you were walking through town to the stables you were lost in your thoughts. Most of them were about her... Was it a crush? You weren't sure, you haven't been in love before, you were always way too focused on surviving. You arrived at the stables, and you saw her there, she was already there waiting for you with a saddled up Shimmer.
Ellie looked tired, but when she noticed your presence her face softened, and a smirk appeared at the corner of her mouth before hugging you. "Hey, how ya doing?"
"Morning Els, didn't think you would be here this early, my morning was good, but better now I'm here with youm" You pulled away from her hug, looking into her green eyes trying to figure out what she could be thinking about... you
No, it can't be... or can it? She always seemed so confident and fierce but was that all true? Was that a mask she always wore so her true feelings wouldn't come to the surface? You hoped you'd find out about it one day. Maybe today could be that day.
As you and Ellie talked for a while, the tiredness that had previously been on her face seemed to disappear. She was in a good mood, perhaps because you were there, talking with you. As you talked, Ellie's mood seemed to improve. You could see a smile on her face as she joked quietly with you, listening intently to what you had to say. When you suggested going up on Shimmer, Ellie immediately agreed. She climbed on the horse's back then patted the Shimmer's neck, before looking at you.
"You're riding with me, right?" Her eyes were sparkling with a hint of mischievousness, she wanted you to ride with her.
"Yeah it would probably be better." You grin at her before she took your hand to help you up on to Shimmer's back. You put your hands around her, noticing the sharp breath she took. "You ready to go?" You ask, squeezing her side a bit to catch her attention.
"Yup let's go." She replied with a smile on her face before motioning Shimmer out of the stables, to the gates that were already opened up for you and the others who went on different paths.
You talked through the whole way, for the first time she opened up to you truly. You had a great time with her, just like you always had but something was different, she was more talkative. Was it because of how close you two got? Probably. You already knew you started to develop a small crush on her but could it be more with her, was she in a relationship? Was she open to date someone? Maybe it was finally time for you to take this risk and shoot your shot. You had nothing much to lose, maybe the friendship. Or maybe not? Maybe you and Ellie will date it's only a matter of time to find out about your own true feelings and about her feelings, perhaps towards you.
You were riding in complete silence as you made your way through a woods to the location that was on you and Ellie's patrol. "So... you got a boyfriend?" She asked you, out of nowhere turning her head to look at you. Her question surprised you, after thinking for a second you just shook your head. "Ohh, so girlfriend?" She bit her lip, while literally staring into your soul with a small smirk trying to find some kind of reaction on your face of confirming what she has been thinking.
"Wish" You reply with a hint of blush on your cheeks. She stared at you for a second her smirk widening. "Oh so you are into girls, huh?" She giggled, then looked back at the surroundings.
"I didn't know you were this straightforward." You reply with a small giggle, the blush on your face just darkened. "Wait look there's the supermarket!" You point to it clearly trying to change the topic. Ellie looks in the way you're pointing, revealing the huge building in your sight.
Silence fell on you again while you and Ellie slowly approached the big supermarket, focusing on your surroundings. Ellie slowed Shimmer down to stop in front of the supermarket. "There it is." She slid off Shimmer, tying the reins to a bike stand. Then she looked at you, a little apprehensive. "You ready?" She looked back at you waiting for you.
"Yes" You replied, taking out your gun out of the holster. Ellie nodded, looking around once more to make sure there was no one else around. Then she walked to the front door, trying to open it. "It's locked... Let's try... and find a fucking door or somethin..." She shook her head then started looking around to find an entrance. You walked around the building, trying to find a broken window, a cracked door, something.
You found a broken window, you rushed back to ellie to tell her that you found it. "Ellie, there's a window on the back of the supermarket!" You said cheered up. Ellie smiled then nodded, following you to the window. Ellie carefully climbed in first, alerted. You followed her sticking by her side.
"Look around see if there's anything useful." She commanded but still had that soft look when she looked at you. "Yes ma'am." You replied in a joking tone which made her blush and smile a little bit, she liked it to say the least.
As you scavenged the place out, you proceed to leave the supermarket along with Ellie. "We got so many things! I haven't found this many things for a while now, looks like you're my good luck charm." You bump your shoulder into hers. She grins and looks at her feet.
"Um, will you take me everywhere you go then?" She tries to joke with you, but deep down she means it. You brush the strand of hair out of her face then lock your eyes wirh hers and stop her in her tracks. "Everywhere." It feels like an unsaid promise that hangs in the air which makes both of you think for a moment. Would this be the right time to... Well it is. Ellie starts to lean closer to you but hesitates. You nod your head that you're ready, desperate to taste her, desperate to feel her on your own lips. You both had been waiting for this moment for a long time now.
She hesitates again then pulls away. "We should go now, it's getting late and we need to take back all the supplies we found." She places her hand on your elbow, leading you back to Shimmer. You're confused and upset, you don't understand why she did that. She seemed as she wanted it. You feel a rush of sadness, but you don't want to show that it hurt you, you feel rejected. As you were zoned out a little bit you tried to snap out of it, got on your horse and started to ride back home. You don't know what to say, whether if you should say something.
"So... Do we call it a success?" You ask squeezing her side to get her attention again. She turns her head towards you, then gives a little nod of agreement. "We fucking do!" You just reply back with a nod and a smile. You feel lost in feelings, drowning. Why is this girl doing all this to you? You don't understand it. The ride back was peaceful, or so you called it peaceful.
You arrived at the ominous gates, and dropped off the supplies. You both went to the stables then said goodbye to the horses then to each other. You went home to sleep the day off, to sleep off the almost kiss.
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sockmeat · 11 months ago
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okay soo requesting for lucifer, cause man is such a sad boy. Okay, idk how these things works I never done like a request so bare with me. So like Lucifer is introducing us (y/n??) to Charlie, you know like were dating her dad lol. And he gets all nervous, and we're like super calm, chill and getting along with Charlie but Lucifer is just a hot mess of anxiety lol
                                                        𓆩♡𓆪
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✼__________________________________________________________✼
𝐆𝐍 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 -- 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞... (𝑯𝒂𝒛𝒃𝒊𝒏 𝑯𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒍)
(𝐰𝐜): 490
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦��𝐫𝐲: After a long time of you being with Lucifer, you finally get the opportunity to meet his daughter, Charlie.
(𝐀/𝐍): Wow i'm going off rn go me
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬): Lucifer is a wreck
                                                        𓆩♡𓆪
♡ You were the one to offer to meet Charlie.
♡ You specifically brought it up after he got Charlie the meeting with Adam. You would've done it before, but they hadn't talked for so long before that point, that you felt it wouldn't be right to bring it up.
♡ But, since Lucifer is warming up to the idea of getting close to Charlie again, you sat him down and asked if you could meet her.
♡ You figured since he thinks of Charlie so highly, and she's his daughter, it would only be right for you to meet her.
♡ But Lucifer was terrified of the idea.
♡ He couldn't think of a solid reason, but he was just so damn nervous, he was too scatterbrained to think of something.
♡ He was just thinking of everything that could go wrong instead of what could actually happen.
♡ Thankfully, you've been with Lucifer long enough that you knew how to handle him when he got like this.
♡ You cracked him until he came to the conclusion that he was just terrified Charlie wouldn't approve of your relationship.
♡ You weren't nervous at all, though.
♡ Lucifer would talk about Charlie all the time, you were confident she wouldn't be so quick to judge and deny you on the first meeting.
♡ It was a few days of Lucifer sitting on the idea before Charlie called to ask him to visit the hotel.
♡ Lucifer was excited about finally getting to see his daughter again and you were excited because you could finally meet her!
♡ Surprisingly, Lucifer was the one to bring it up, by walking you out the door himself and talking about how excited he was.
♡ But that excitement quickly turned into nerves, in typical Lucifer fashion.
♡ You were able to successfully keep his nerves controlled until you were finally at the Hotel and Charlie let you in.
♡ Lucifer first turned his attention to Keekee, then Razzle and Dazzle, before he ran out of things to stall with.
♡ Charlie introduced Vaggie to Lucifer as her girlfriend and that's when Lucifer saw an opening and pushed through.
♡ It wasn't as smooth as he had hoped, but he nearly melted into his boots when you took over and introduced yourself to everyone in the hotel.
♡ He was even more relieved when you and Charlie hit it off without a hitch.
♡ You both talked passionately about her Hazbin Hotel project, with you being interested and her being eager to tell someone about it.
♡ Lucifer was very happy to see his two favorite people getting along so well, even when Alastor was taunting him and trying to get under his skin.
♡ With the way you and Charlie bonded, there was no denying that this wouldn't be the last time you would meet, and you would definitely bring Lucifer with you.
                                                        𓆩♡𓆪
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fancyfeathers · 26 days ago
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Happy thanksgiving, I hope it is going well🦃
Thank you for responding to my other ask about the flinching around the batfamily. But now another question has popped up in my head, what if Daughter reader just randomly picks one of the "siblings" to cling onto for dear life. But it backfires for the sibling because uh oh! Daughter Reader met their friend and suddenly boom she has a crush on them. Example Maybe: Tim? (I love Tim he's my favorite lol.) Daughter Reader sees his "subtleness" in obsession or whatever he likes to call it😒 Reader is chilling with Tim, then KON walks in and she never whipped her head around so fast. (Obviously Tim notices.) Now not only is Tim (or any other sibling of the batfamily you'd like to use) is dealing with a clingy reader, now they're dealing with said reader constantly asking them about their friend and occasionally stealing their phone to stare at pictures of said friend. (She's a little creepy she's been cooped up in a manor for like a decade by now give her a break she's trying her best.) OR! When the batsibling's friend comes back over reader gives them a drawing she made of them Thank you reading have a lovely Day/Night! - 🐈‍⬛Anon
Yandere Batfam w/ Wife/Mother!Darling & Daughter/Sister!Darling Masterlist
Ooooo this is giving me ideas
I did make Daughter!Darling younger than Damian so Kon might be a bit too old for her (or young… he was created in a lab, but that’s a whole other can of worms)
But this gave me an ideas for two scenarios that stem from this idea…
Taking the crush aspect out of this cause of age differences with the idea with Kon, like Tim brings him around to the house for the first time while Daughter!Darling is home from school or one of the many outings that Dick takes her on of his choosing. Connor is definitely friendly to her, Tim has definitely mentioned his little sister to him, how amazing she is, how adorable, how perfect-
She looks terrified when Damian came around looking for her, mentioning something about notes in class…
Then the second time he comes around to visit, he catches a glimpse of Bruce locking her bedroom door with her inside… who does that?
Then when he came around to see Tim and he walked into the living room and he saw his friends taking photos of her just sitting and doing schoolwork and she clearly looks uncomfortable.
He finds some excuse to have Tim leave the room so he can ask her…
“Are you okay?”
“N-no…”
He felt horrible for her, but he did not have anymore time to ask questions before Tim returned. Kon is not capable of taking care of a child but he knows people who definitely can.
It’s when she is at school and out on the swings alone, Damian scared away her friends again today and…
“Hello, mind if I sit by you?”
There is a man with glasses and a visitor’s pass that comes to speak with her and she lets him, he introduces himself as Clark Kent and he lets her connect the dots. He lets her know that she can speak freely and he is here to help her and just everything spills out with tears. Clark would be horrified by what he hears, this little girl is in danger and no one had cared enough to help her and-
“Hang on tight.”
There is just a quick moment before he picks her up and they are in the air with him taking her somewhere he’ll know she’ll be safe for now anyway, with his family.
He’ll explain things to Lois and Jon, but he is sure they will understand… they have to…
The other way I could see this scenario going is…
With the idea of when she starts having a boyfriend who is a member of the Court of Owls (I mentioned him in these posts, link, link, link, link)
But Damian would have probably have made friends to help with his cover, and of course there is the most perfect boy in school, talented, smart, kind, head of the student council, on many sports teams. Then when Damian began attending that school after Talia left him with Bruce, he was the one who was we so adamant about making him feel welcome, but of course it was a fake friendship on both sides. The boy had no real interest in being Damian’s friend, but he also needs to keep up his appearance.
He could honestly care less about Damian until when they come into his first period class and introduce a new student, Damian’s little sister and when the teacher asks for volunteers to show her around the classroom, his hand shoots up. Damian is fine enough with his friend to help his sister, he won’t get close-
That is until the end of the day when he sees her walking down the steps of the school with that boy, laughing and chatting with each other. It is fine, he is a family with a good reputation-
Then when he is supposed to come over for a school project for Damian’s and his science class, he is talking to his sister after they are done working and are waiting for his driver.
Then there is the time when they just went on summer break and she comes into Damian’s room and asks for the address of the boy’s summer home because they promised to write to each other and she had his address on her phone but she got it taken away since she would only need it to call the family and she-
Damian wants to pull out his hair more and more every time she mentions this boy. This goes on for years and into high school and it all comes to a boiling point where Damian catches them making out in the stairwell.
Oh my god he wants to kill them, wants to rip out his heart, wants to bang his head into the concrete over and over again. He restrains himself and only threatens him with some bruising and harsh words.
But after that nothing is the same.
His sister distances herself from Damian, he cuts off his friend, but then true colors begin to show to Damian, only Damian.
Like when he opens his locker and finds it defaced, threats, insults, and strangely enough a feather, like a signature, but to whom does it belong to?
The boy puts on his perfect facade and acts like he actually cares about Damian and as it he had nothing to do with it, but his laughter when he is talking to his group of friends just seems too loud, the kisses he shares with his sister are almost smug, and the perfect smile and the praise he receives from his teachers and classmates leaves a sour taste in Damian’s mouth.
He wished he had asked his father to have his sister homeschool.
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pandapetals · 30 days ago
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Couple Questions
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You and Logan answer some couple questions!
professor logan howlett x professor fem!reader - married couple, cute, fluff, banter, no y/n used, no reader description, your an english professor, logan is a history professor
a/n: not the usual update but I saw some couple questions on pinterest and thought you know what…im gonna do this because it’s cute. i may or may not also have headcanons for them lol.
read on ao3 or find more parts for the series: here
divider credit: @enchanthings
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What were your first impressions of each other?
You : grinning "I thought he was rude. He barely said hello when I first arrived at the mansion, just mumbled something and walked away like I wasn’t worth his time."
Logan : smirking "To be fair, I had a lot on my mind."
You : "But then I caught him staring at me in the library one day, and I thought, ‘Huh, maybe he’s not as grumpy as he looks.’ Turns out I was wrong—he’s grumpier.” teasingly nudges him
Logan : chuckling "You done? ‘Cause my first impression was that you talked too much."
You : mock gasp "Excuse me?!"
Logan : shrugging "But you had this fire about you. Didn’t take crap from anyone. Thought that was… different." pauses, his voice softening "And your laugh. First time I heard it, I couldn’t get it outta my head."
Describe the moment each of you knew you had feelings for each other.
You : thoughtful smile "I think it was when Jean told me Logan liked me. It just… clicked. All the banter, the little glances, the way he’d hover nearby even though he pretended not to care—it all made sense. Once I realized it, it was like… yeah, I like him too. It was terrifying and exciting at the same time."
Logan : scratching the back of his neck, pretending to look annoyed "She’s makin’ me sound soft already."
You : "You are soft."
Logan : ignoring her "For me, it was probably when I realized she wasn’t offended by my attitude. That’s when I knew she wasn’t just anyone. She was my someone."
Did either of you fight your feelings, or was it easy to accept?
You : snorting "Oh, we both fought it. He avoided me a lot of the time. I overthought everything —does he like me? What if I’m imagining it? What if I ruin our friendship?"
Logan : dryly "You do think too much. Me? I didn’t avoid you."
You : glaring playfully "You literally avoided the library for two weeks, and that’s your favorite place!"
Logan : grinning faintly "Alright, fine. Maybe I fought it a little. Was scared I’d mess things up. Didn’t think someone like you would want someone like me."
You : softly, brushing his hand "You’re an idiot for thinking that, but you’re my idiot."
When was the first time you said “I love you”? What prompted it?
You : "It was after a nightmare. Logan woke up in a cold sweat, muttering apologies for scaring me. But he hadn’t scared me—I just wanted to comfort him. And in the middle of me rambling about how it was okay, it just came out: ‘I love you.’"
Logan : quietly "Didn’t think I’d ever hear those words from someone. But when she said it, I couldn’t stop myself. Told her I loved her right back."
You : smiling softly "And then you called me a ‘damn fool’ for putting up with you."
Logan : shrugging "I stand by it."
Who is the big spoon, who is the little spoon?
You : "Oh, Logan’s the big spoon, obviously. But sometimes I’ll be the big spoon when he’s had a rough day. He pretends to hate it, but I know he secretly likes it."
Logan : grumbling "I don’t need a damn cocoon, sweetheart."
You : grinning "But you still let me."
What’s your favorite quality about each other?
You : "Logan’s loyalty. He’ll protect the people he loves with everything he has, even when he doesn’t think he deserves to be loved back."
Logan : looking at her, his voice softer "Her heart. She’s got this way of makin’ everyone feel like they matter. Like they’re worth somethin’. That’s rare."
You : teasingly "Stop, you’re gonna make me cry."
Logan : smirking "Good. Payback for all the times you make me feel stuff."
Who is the messiest?
You : raising her hand immediately "Me. Absolutely me."
Logan : snorting "Finally, somethin’ we agree on."
You : "Hey, at least I know where everything is in my mess. Your ‘organized’ piles confuse me."
Logan : "It ain’t hard, darlin’. One pile’s for weapons, the other’s for books. What’s so confusin’?"
Who sings in the shower?
You : grinning mischievously "Logan does. And he doesn’t even realize it half the time. It’s adorable."
Logan : deadpan "I don’t sing in the shower."
You : "Oh, so the other day when I walked by and heard you mumbling ‘Sweet Caroline’ under your breath, that wasn’t you?"
Logan : grumbling "I was hummin’ it. There’s a difference."
You : sarcastically "Sure, tough guy. Whatever helps you sleep at night."
Who likes horror movies? Who likes romance movies?
You : grinning "Logan likes horror movies, obviously. He’ll sit there, all serious, like nothing phases him. But I swear I caught him flinch once during The Exorcist ."
Logan : gruffly "Did not."
You : "You did. Anyway, I like romance movies. Logan pretends to hate them, but he always ends up watching them with me."
Logan : smirking "That’s ‘cause I know you’ll cry, and I gotta be ready to hand you tissues."
You : rolling her eyes "And yet, who was tearing up during The Notebook last week? Hmm?"
Logan : groaning "Alright, fine. I might like some of ‘em. But don’t go tellin’ anyone."
You : "Oh, your secret’s safe with me. But I’ll totally remind you next time we watch Pride and Prejudice ."
Logan : grinning, pulling her closer "You’re somethin’ else, sweetheart."
What’s your favorite memory of us?
You:thoughtfully smiling “That’s hard to pick. But… I think it was when you planned that romantic getaway for my birthday—you bought me that dress. Or when you wrote that for me poem and gave it to me for Christmas.”
Logan:grinning faintly “You mean the one where you cried ‘cause I wrote you that little poem in the book?”
You:mock gasping “You wrote me a poem , Logan. Of course, I cried! I still have that dress, by the way.”
Logan:chuckling, his voice softer now “That was a good one. But for me? I think it’s our wedding. Just you, me, and those vows I wrote on a scrap of paper. You called me an idiot for cryin’ halfway through.”
You:sniffing dramatically “And I’ll call you an idiot for it again, but only because you cried first. You set me off.”
Logan:smirking “You weren’t even gonna cry ‘til I pulled out that damn lucky pen you gave me.”
You:“Well, yeah, it’s our lucky pen, Logan! What did you expect?”
Hugs or kisses?
You:grinning slyly “Kisses. Definitely kisses.”
Logan:raising an eyebrow “Really? I’d say hugs.”
You:blinking in mock surprise “Logan Howlett likes hugs? Who are you and what have you done with my husband?”
Logan:shrugging, smirking a little “What can I say? There’s somethin’ about you wrappin’ yourself around me that just feels right.”
You:melting a little before recovering quickly “Okay, you win that one. But kisses still come with extra perks.”
Logan:grinning wickedly “Oh, I know.”
Who finds it harder to admit they’re wrong?
You:“Oh, Logan. 100% Logan.”
Logan:gruffly “What? That’s not true.”
You:glaring playfully “Logan, you once argued with me for three hours about the best way to cook eggs—only to realize you were wrong and never admit it.”
Logan:grumbling “That’s ‘cause your way still doesn’t make sense.”
You:crossing her arms “Oh, it makes perfect sense, tough guy. You’re just stubborn.”
Logan:grinning faintly “Alright, fine. Maybe I don’t like bein’ wrong.”
You:“Maybe?!”
Who’s the boss in the marriage?
You:smirking, pointing to herself “Obviously me.”
Logan:laughing softly “Yeah, you think so, huh?”
You:“Logan, who does the meal planning? The laundry schedules? Who makes sure you actually remember birthdays and anniversaries?”
Logan:grinning “Alright, you. But who fixes stuff when it breaks? Who makes sure no one bothers you when you’re havin’ a bad day? Who makes the coffee in the mornin’ exactly how you like it?”
You:softening, smiling sweetly “Alright, fine. We’re both the boss in different ways. But let’s be honest—when it comes to arguments, you fold first.”
Logan:mock scowling “Only ‘cause you give me those damn eyes. Ain’t fair.”
Who has the best jokes?
You:grinning smugly “Me. Hands down.”
Logan:snorting “Yeah, okay. But only ‘cause your jokes are so bad, they’re funny.”
You:“Excuse me?!”
Logan:grinning “Sweetheart, half your jokes are puns. Don’t get me wrong, I love seein’ you crack yourself up, but best jokes? Nah.”
You:frowning in mock offense “Fine, then let’s hear one of your so-called ‘good’ jokes.”
Logan:deadpan “Why’d the history book break up with the science book? No chemistry.”
You:blinking, then laughing despite herself “Okay, that was actually pretty good. Damn it.”
Who is grumpier?
You:“Oh, Logan. No contest.”
Logan:shrugging, unbothered “Yeah, probably.”
You:giggling “You’re basically a walking thundercloud until you’ve had your coffee. And even then, you’ve got about an hour before you start growling at people.”
Logan:smirking “That’s true, but you’re no ray of sunshine when you’re hungry.”
Who gets angry when they’re hungry?
You:immediately “Okay, fine. That’s me. But in my defense, you always know when to feed me before I get too hangry.”
Logan:chuckling “Damn right I do. Learned that the hard way on one of our first dates.”
You:giggling “Oh, you mean the time you forgot to feed me after making me hike five miles, and I almost bit your head off?”
Logan:grinning “Yup. You didn’t even wait for the food to hit the table before tearin’ into me. Thought I was gonna lose a hand.”
You:grinning sheepishly “Hey, at least you didn’t run for the hills.”
Logan:softly, leaning closer “Nah, sweetheart. I’d take your hangry self over anyone else any day.”
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yandereshingeki · 2 months ago
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The Antithesis of Decay
made for @ficsforgaza’s Kinktober!
⬑ please check them out! ⬏
Masterlist
Word Count: 2.2k
Pairing: Tomura Shigaraki x afab!reader
Content Warnings: Stuckage, fingering, dub/noncon, no gendered pronouns, but reader is described to have bigger hips than their waist (no big specifications though). meant to take place between s3 & 4
Summary: An escape through the alleyway ends in a terrifying run-in with a wanted villain.
Managed to write this entirely in a single day 😵‍💫 it gave me a headache doing it that fast but thank god i got it done! It was a lot longer than I intended (stuckage is hard to keep short akhsheja & i originally wanted to go full smut but then wrote too much) and was a little bit difficult to navigate cause I don’t think about shiggy in a sexual way BUT !! I DID IT!
This is also the first time I'm posting something I've written in present tense, I'm just trying to experiment and figure out how I like to write lol
Shiggy lovers i hope this is adequate!!
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Another crash. Another roar. Another Nomu.
You're in the thick of it, beside a building, half-destroyed, and another one completely toppled to the ground. There's screaming and panic, citizens running in every which way to escape the crossfire. Another building is about to collapse, and the monsters take no hesitation in using it as leverage to fight.
There are other heroes here, maybe three, or even more now if there were any on patrol nearby; it isn't clear through the fog of dirt and smoke. It isn't enough though. None of you had the strength or stamina to fight against the group of Nomus that appeared. Especially not by yourselves, even if you barely outnumbered them. The rubble is building. The ground is practically shaking under their destructive hands. They have the absolute advantage.
  Your quirk isn't built for such a fight, even as a pro, and your combat skills would prove useless against those monsters. You're meant to be more of a support hero than anything, someone usually waiting on the sidelines to rush in and heal the defending heroes in fights. The limits of your restorative quirk meant it was wise to steer clear from the heart of the battle and avoid being hurt, so the best course of action would be to run. Run and find backup. That's the most you can do for now; the most you can try to save what remains of that small city sector.
You choose your path quickly, remaining observant of the chaos around you. Cracked asphalt and concrete, dust flying everywhere from the destruction, debris from the second half-collapsed building scattered everywhere. The Nomus remain distracted by the other heroes, so despite the obstacles, there's a clear path to the closest alleyway. From there, if you can just reach the other side of the buildings and escape harm's way, you'll be safe to make the call.
You can make it, you believe — as long as you're fast. Confident, you take off, bound for the crack between two untouched office buildings nearby, the spring in your costume's boots allowing you to move more efficiently. With such quick speed, you nearly run face-first into the wall, entering it at an angle that's easy to correct with a simple push off against the brick. From there, the path is a straight shot to the other side, only separated by a feeble chain link fence. There's a hole that looks just big enough for you to crawl through at the bottom of it, the wire pried upward to create a gap. You can make it, you repeat in your head. The coast is clear, you can make it.
  Stumbling to a stop in front of the mesh barrier, you drop to your knees as quickly as your body will allow, planting yourself onto your stomach afterward. The opening is much smaller up close, but it's nothing you can't army-crawl your way through. Your costume was made to be dirtied and protect you in the heat of conflict, so having it scrape across the rocky ground while you drag your way under the fence isn't an issue. Its durability was the least of your problems — until now, that is..
  The elastic fabric snags on the wire once you squeeze your head and arms through the hole. Time is sensitive, you don’t have any to waste on something trivial like this. You try to reach back to untangle it, only to find the wire completely stabbed through. 
  With a heavy sigh and adrenaline crawling in your veins at the delay, you manage to move back a sizable distance before you try again, but it’s useless. The ends of the wires are sharp and stab into your suit with ease, holding you back. You needed to try something else, you needed to be fast.
  Before you can attempt to force your way through the hole, a voice arises behind you. Raspy and hoarse, you don’t even realize he's there until he speaks.
  “Oh, look at what we have here. A hero, is it?”
  His approach is slow, and you only hear his footsteps once he's standing over you. Your entire body goes stiff, your blood running cold as you curve your spine back to look at him.
  "Shigaraki," you whisper, terrified, under your breath. 
  "Oh, you know me already? How nice, I suppose we can skip the introductions then." 
  You can hear your breath hitch in your throat when he speaks and feel his presence as he looms right behind you, bending at the knees to crouch down over your legs.
  "I've seen you on TV," he starts, and you hold back a scream when you feel four rough fingers gently touch the back of your thigh, "You've got quite the impressive quirk, you know. Restoration quirks are hard to come by. And yours…"
  He pauses again, glides them up to where your hip and femur jointed together, and relishes in the way you shiver before he continues, "It's the exact opposite of mine. I guess you can only restore organic things, sure, but — it does make me wonder."
  You're hardly listening to his little ramble, your heartbeat drumming too loud in your ears to process anything — but then, your head goes blank when you feel all five of his fingers cup around your hip. Panic sets in fast, and you find yourself writhing before you can think, trying to force your way through the fence. The metal wires only dig into your skin, causing even more pain as you realize you're hips are too big to fit, and you wouldn't have made it anyway.
  Tomura only chuckles lightly at your reaction, watching the bottom half of your hero suit disintegrate into dust. You don't even realize it until you're already crying, and a cold breeze hits your face and bottom half. His hand is on you. Touching you. Feeling you, and yet.
  You don't feel any pain. His touch is simply normal against your skin. His palm is surprisingly warm, but dry. And you don't disintegrate. You don't disintegrate.
  Tomura laughs again at wide eyes and gaping mouth as if you should have expected his quirk to cancel out with yours. He slides his palm across your bottom, down to the back of your thigh again to caress it up and down slowly. Carefully. His touch lingers far longer than you're comfortable with.
  "Your quirk activates automatically when it's your own body, right? I wonder how long I can keep doing this for, then." He speaks so casually, acting like you weren't trapped and half-bare under him.
  "I've always wanted to be able to touch someone like this again. No gloves, no barriers. Just skin. When I saw you on the news and heard about your quirk, I thought you were perfect. Aside from that pesky hero stuff, that is," he frowned slightly behind the hand on his face, moving his own to grip at the fat of your ass, "You have no idea how frustrating it is to be unable to touch something without it falling apart."
  You let out a loud squeak, feeling his weight on the back of your knees when he sits on them, squeezing and kneading your flesh in his hand. There are tears in your eyes, and you struggle to twist around to look back at him, where he sits proudly like a king on his throne. Seeing such a widely known villain — being face to face, but being stuck and having him touch you like this. It felt humiliating. Humiliating to who you were as a person and a hero. You felt sick to your stomach.
  He frowns a little at the pathetic look you give him, only tightening his hold more, "Come on, don't look like that. I haven't done anything yet."
  As he speaks, he slides another hand underneath you and pulls your hips up slightly, your spine beginning to ache at how it was strained. You can only shake as you watch him, the hand that was gripping your ass moving to slide a single finger down the center of your underwear, sending a large jolt up your spine.
  In an instant, you look forward again, covering your mouth to hold back any noise you'd almost let out. You don't want to give him the satisfaction of making a sound, let it be cries or anything. So you force yourself to silence, even as tears roll down your face.
  Tomura only grins, running the finger up and down the fabric a few more times just to feel you jolt before hooking around the lining to pull it off to the side, stuffing it between your thigh and outer labia to keep you exposed. You clench up at the cold air, another shudder roving through your body as Tomura holds back a chuckle.
  Without another thought or word, he immediately dives in, his two fingers sliding between your folds, feeling whatever you can offer him before moving down to the bud below. You shiver, but are otherwise completely frozen as he does this, not even knowing half of what to do to retaliate.
  "Not too wet yet, I see. That's ok, I can fix that." He says, beginning to prod around for that extra sensitive spot he knew you wouldn't resist. A lightbulb goes off in his head when you jolt suddenly, your hips shaking extra whenever he squishes or pokes at it. With a grin plastered under that embalmed hand, he starts to move his fingers around in slow, gentle circles.
  The coarseness of his fingers doesn't help the sensation they bring on, that feeling of soft ecstasy pulsing through your body slowly like a drum. You hold back your sounds, at least, only your breathing growing heavy as he watches you clench around nothing. 
  It isn't enough for him. He needs more than this, he needs you prepared, and that wouldn’t come from just a few measly touches. 
  His fingers move faster, gaining enough friction that he has you audibly gasping, slick already building up just below. It doesn't take as long as expected, like your body is reacting on primal need. It almost makes him wonder — maybe you're getting off to the position he has you in, even if you don't realize it.
  He gives you a few more minutes of soft touching, allowing a good amount of wetness to accumulate between your shaking thighs before moving his fingers up. He gathers your natural lube on his digits, humming as he slathers it all over your pussy to make it nice and glossy before dipping them back in, finally allowing them to take the plunge.
  As if you weren't already amply humiliated, the way his fingers toy with you before pressing in is distracting enough that he manages to draw a squeak out of you the second he dives in.
  "Ohh, give me more of that. Don't be shy." He says, sliding his digits out slowly, licking his lips at how slick they are before shoving them back in.
  His fingers are so long, soaking knuckle-deep inside of you and reaching parts that your own couldn't. You would rather die at his hands now than ever admit it to anyone, but god, it feels good.
  He's already moving them so fast, curling them all around like he's searching for something. It felt too good to be touched by someone like that. You haven't slept with another person for over a year, so it's like a new foreign feeling and an old friend all at once. You can't stop yourself. Your brain grows foggier with each drag of his fingers, like he's scratching an itch you couldn’t by yourself. You couldn't hold it back anymore.
  You let out a quiet, croaked moan, covering your face with your hands to hide how embarrassing it is to indulge in something so crude with someone like him.
  A wretched smile immediately dawns on Tomura's face, and he moves his hand even faster, trying to milk more sounds out of you before he moves on. He wants you to make more noise, to hear how good a disgusting villain like him is making a great hero like you feel.
  From there, the sounds just spilled out. He’s surprisingly quick to find the smooth spot inside of you, pumping over it repeatedly until you’re a wriggling, gasping mess. The coil inside of you is winding up tight, growing ready to burst at almost any second. 
  It's so degrading, being face down in the concrete while a villain is digging his fingers so deep into you. But you weren’t thinking about that anymore. Your mind is too focused on how good it feels rubbing against your walls, the friction driving you crazy with how fast it builds up.
  Then, like electricity in your veins, it comes crashing through your body all at once. The pleasure, the ecstasy. Your body practically vibrates against his hand, an unforgiving orgasm ripping through your entire system until you’re panting like a dog, still pulsing around him as he slowly removes his fingers and wipes them on your thigh.
  As you return from your high, the quiet chuckling unnerves you. And then you feel sick to your stomach again. You’re still recovering, but you’ve come to your senses enough to look behind you.
  The sight you see has bile rising in your throat. He’s already grabbed onto you again, unzipping his pants with one hand while he speaks.
  “So, what do you think your little hero friends would think if you had sex with a villain?”
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featguler · 6 months ago
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Heyyy i have a request for tchouaméni 😄 , where his girlfriend is clingy towards him , always needing to cuddle him just to sleep 🥹🥹🥹
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'til there's no tomorrow ────── you reach for his side of the bed.
♡ ────── pairing : aurélien tchouaméni x reader ♡ ────── tags : reader is female. her ethnicity, nationality, and appearance is not specified. slight depiction and description of anxiety. pre-established relationship with aure. ♡ ────── wordcount : 490 ♡ ────── notes : anon don't kill me but i kind switched the positions a bit... and this ends up being tchouameni not being able to sleep without his gf LOL. i might do another one where his gf is extra clingy though, just bc it's such a cute idea!! i hope you enjoy this :3 title is from niall horan's you could start a cult ♡ masterlist.
“Aurélien?”
Aurélien would say that as a professional athlete, sleeping has got to be the one aspect of a lifestyle like his that had been undermined like crazy. It’s always stamina, and focus, and strength. But lack of sleep causes your body to gain deadweight—it will grow to rot, stewing in stress while eventually weakening.
This fact had been drilled in his mind.
Sleep. Sleep. Sleep.
Even resting is not the same as sleeping.
It is so easy to listen to people in a pair of overpriced joggers and headband ramble on and on about the importance of actually getting the proper amount of sleep, but when you are faced with the reality of a hurt knee joint, or a deteriorating passing performance, your brain just can’t help but insist that instead of spending your nights on the bed, you should be on treadmill, or on a field.
His knee aches, and it shakes. Aurélien had been staring at an empty for the past half an hour or so, the muscles in his legs screaming at him to take a small jog around his house to feel some sort of long-needed adrenaline.
He has enough of being on the bench, if he can just be frank.
Hearing your voice calling out to him in the pitch black, he tenses for a moment, looking behind him, his eyes already adjusted to the dark. “Yes, my love?”
“Are you here?”
Aurélien chuckles, shifting so that he could get a better view of your closed eyes. His hand reaches to stroke your head. “Where else would I be?”
“Not sleeping?” You ask, mumbling your words. You open one eye, trying to search for him, before giving up and closing them again. “Come here, baby, you gotta sleep.”
“I will,” he laughs softly, leaning down to place a soft kiss against your forehead.
“No,” you pout, scooching over to his side of the bed, gripping his arm. “Come here,” you whine, “I wanna hug— wanna cuddle.”
“Aww, “ he coos, giving in to the sweet sound of your whine. He throws himself under the blanket, sprawling one arm under your head while the other wraps itself around your waist. “Are you comfortable?”
You murmur your answer, unclear, before repeating with a quiet, “Yeah, yeah.”
Aurélien watches the way your eyes open lightly, then close again. Your breath is slow, relaxed, and even through the dark, he can see your pretty face change into one expression from the other, as though you have gone back to the land of dreams.
He moves, pressing himself closer against you, lips on top of your nose, before timidly calling out your name, like he is afraid that he would take away some of your precious sleeping time.
When he sees that you did not answer, he chuckles to himself. “I love you,” he says again, still somewhat terrified that he will wake you up, “I love you so much.”
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pboogerswbb · 2 months ago
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TOO LOST IN YOU - PLAYLIST
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Songs inspiring the upcoming series (I shamelessly stole the playlist concept from the queen @pb524830 go read her fics if you haven't lol).
Go read: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8
Sugababes - Too Lost In You ""Lost in everything about you so deep, I can't sleep, I can't think, I just think about the things that you do, I'm too lost in you" The Weeknd, JENNIE, Lily-Rose Depp - One Of The Girls "And I'm screamin' out, give me tough love, leave me with nothin' when I come down" Chase Atlantic - Into It "I'm just fucking lucky I was born with it, a hundred million people couldn't deal with this, I've been trying grow cause people kill for it, this mental pressure got me popping pills and shit" Childish Gambino - Heartbeat "Say the wrong thing and wrong girls come runnin', I'm paranoid that these girls want something from me" Kelsey Lu - I'm Not In Love (cover) "I'm not in love so don't forget it, it's just a silly phase I'm going through, and just because I call you up, don't get me wrong don't think you've got it made, I'm not in love" The Weeknd - Valerie "Valerie, I know you can see through me, Valerie, you just choose to never know, Valerie, why pretend to trust in me?" Billie Eilish - I Didn't Change My Number "I love a "You mad at me?" text, should've guess, that you would think i was upset, you're obsessed" Brent Faiyaz - Been Away "I just wanna know if you're my friend, I just wanna know if you're pretending, I know I've been away" BANKS - Mind Games "All your moves that make me wanna run away, but I got stuck with faulty legs, I believe it's true that you would screw me if I let you in my bedroom, and if i did then do I try to move away, cause I know you like mind games" The Weeknd, Lana Del Rey - Prisoner "I'm a prisoner to my addictions, I'm addicted to a life that's so empty and so cold, I'm a prisoner to my decisions" 88rising, NIKI, Rich Brian - Shouldn’t Couldn’t Wouldn’t “Not one for titles girl in other words terrified, that pussy kicked my rules out the door”
parts will be coming out next week! thank you for the love and support <3 kissies
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cupcakeslushie · 5 months ago
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I dont usually send asks, mostly cause im shy and don’t know what to say lol, but I wanted to share my appreciation for your Kendratello AU, cause it’s helped me recognize a toxic relationship in my own life.
I’ve never been a victim to SA or anything of the likes, so I can’t say I’ve been EXACTLY in Donnie’s place, but something that unsettled me early on when reading your AU was how…NICE Kendra would seem when alone with Donnie.
In a lot of media, especially in the media I saw growing up, the manipulative antagonist almost always had very obvious tells that show they’re evil when interacting with the victim. Maybe they’re talking about committing a very clearly villainous deed, keep the protagonist prisoner, something like that. But Kendra didn’t. Well, not always.
Kendra destroyed Donnie from the foundation up, and then rebuilt him back up to be who she wanted him to be, would punish him but then spin the situation around to be his own fault, but the rest of the time she would seem kind.
Only recently have I realized that someone very close to me has been toxic for most of our lives, and the reason it took me this long to realize it was because they would treat me kindly only until it became in their own interest to act otherwise. But I would take it, because I loved them and didn’t want to hurt their feelings, and I assumed that since they loved me, they wouldn’t ACTUALLY (emotionally) hurt me.
Spoiler alert: they did.
I’m not going to get much more into it, but your AU’s been very comforting to me ever since this happened, because it’s helping me come to terms with the fact that what happened wasn’t my fault just because our relationship seemed nice most of the time.
Your depiction of Kendra manipulating Donnie so realistically, and Donnie slowly but surely realizing that Kendra was hurting him is so powerful, and I thank you for that.
I’m so happy for you Anon 💚💚
It’s good to see these patterns, and depending on how toxic the relationship is, to speak up for yourself, or cut the person out, if they are unwilling to change.
Kindness is often a tool used by manipulators. But the biggest thing to ask yourself is exactly what you saw. Is this person only nice to me when they need something from me? And if so, then this isn’t real kindness. Good for you for knowing your worth!!
⚠️
sa related ask and discussions of very toxic relationships…
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Personal experience rambling below. Toxic friendship and sa mention.
I’ll only be discussing this once, here, in this post. So I’m afraid if I get anyone asking for further info, I’m not going to reply /lh
I’m very sorry for what you’ve gone through. I hope you can find what you need to heal. Everyone’s traumas are so different, so please if you can, and haven’t already, speak to a professional that will give you help catered to you.
But I do want to immediately answer your question and say, yes, I have healed, for the most part. It took a lot of work and self-reflection that I didn’t want to do, because it was scary. But when I finally talked to someone, and realized I needed to take action in order to heal, that was when the process started.
For years, I thought my only options were to suffer in silence, and that what happened to me was my own fault, because towards the end, I was consenting. But I didn’t understand how my mindset and self worth had become so twisted.
My person (let’s call him J) was one of my best friends growing up. But as he got older, and more interested in…mature things, he changed. J would only ever agree to hang out together unless I offered to give him something to make it worth his while. Eventually I started to think these acts were all I was good for, as that’s all that made him happy to be around me. Pretty soon, J didn’t even have to push the ideas onto me. He only had to act uninterested or busy, and I would sit there and beg to do whatever he wanted.
The idea of rejection grew to be so painful and terrifying as he was one of only two friends that I had (the other being his sister. So if I lost one, I was so scared to lose the other). And I’d recently lost one of my closest childhood friends. Which he often used her cutting contact with us in his manipulations as well.
(It wasn’t until years later that she contacted me through Facebook and revealed that it was J that made her feel too uncomfortable, and as she already lived two hours away from us, and only visited once a year, it was just easier for her to cut off contact. I don’t blame her now, but without that knowledge, the thought that it was something I did, only helped J manipulate me.)
As I grew older, and I got better friends, I started to learn just how much I’d been pushed into only ever doing what he wanted, and how one sided of a relationship it was. He moved away, and that distance I was so scared of became a reality. But it was the best thing to ever happen. I still wonder what would’ve happened if he’d stayed in town. If we might’ve gotten married or if I would’ve finally stood up for myself. But all that matters is he is gone. There is always the danger of him coming home and me seeing him—we were neighbors, so his parents and mine still live right next door. Holidays can be kind of a high stress time lol.
That cafe comic is actually probably the most therapeutic piece out of the whole Kendratello AU I’ve done, as it’s always been a fear of mine that I could just turn around and he’d be in town visiting lol. Sending Kendra through that portal was highly cathartic. But even if that were to happen now, I have my coping skills, and I’m in a much better headspace. I think I would be able to handle myself.
I’m still a people pleaser, I don’t think that’s ever going to go away, even with all the work I’ve done. The biggest thing is, I know I’m worth more now. I can see real kindness, and catch the fake stuff much better by looking for those same toxic signs. The real friendships I’ve made have shown me what connection is truly like. It’s not a one-sided negotiation every time you get together. And if it is, then it’s probably not a healthy give and take. I’ve healed, but it is a constant effort.
Every new person sets off some kind of anxiety in the back of my head, but I don’t let that fear control how our relationship will develop. I’ve got the final say in what happens and what I get out of it.
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thegnomelord · 8 months ago
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Ohm nom - 🦈 (I have some news, I was doing some research on DnD species and found a humanoid shark species called Sharkin. I though yo! Thats fin-flipin awesome but um there is one paragraph that made me take a backturn. I highlighted the main bits "Sharkin fought with and hunted any sort of creature that looked either powerful or threatening to them, including dinosaurs and dragons, making them top predators inside and outside of water. They are hated by most if not all surface dwelling races, making them enemy number one to almost everyone. They are even hated and despised by dragons, since the first time they killed an adult red dragon. This was not a one time problem, and has caused a bitter rivalry between the Dragons and Sharkins. They favored the taste of dragon flesh, from that day onward it became the largest badge of honor available for a Sharkin to hunt and kill a dragon. This then henceforth became a great and mighty challenge, for a member of the Sharkin royal family to hunt and bag a dragon, the bigger the better. The royal family loved the taste of dragons so much they made it their most favored treat among all other delicacies of their people. They often form hunting parties specifically to hunt and bag a dragon for any special occasion or festival. This made any and all dragon absolutely despise Sharkin, for they looked at them as prey and dragons being the vain creatures they are hate them. A dragon that sees a Sharkin will immediate become enraged and will do whatever it can to kill and devour it." NOW reasonably i was quite frazzled and immedietly though about our lil Shark captain of our lil marine team, thats partnered, HAND in HAND with a Dragon Captain. But then another idea came to me, this Sharkin species, (despite how cool they are and i still love) are built on the sterotype that Shark are horrendous terrifying vicous, agreesive creature. When in reality Sharks are just fish puppies that could murder you if you pissed them off enough. So that got me thinking, what if due to rumours, shark hybrids were thought to be Dangerous and Hazordous species, due to horrendous strerotypes, and a movie, most were meant to be cool, but were misinterpited so badly that people started getting afriad of them and in turn, aggressive towards. This is mainly based on a real thing, Both the author of Jaws, Peter Benchley, and the director, Steven Spielberg, regret the negative impact the film had on shark populations and the perpetuation of shark stereotypes. So people think that the captains would naturally butt heads, due to sterotypes and rumours that nearly brought the two species to war. (Which was luckily debunked way before anything got violent and now both species are currently fighting against anything harmful towards the other. Creating the oddest but oddly wholesome cross-species relationships. ) Only to find out the two are bound by the hip. waz your take? *Administer Foreheads Kisses*)
Oh yeah, I know the jaws effect lol It's fascinating how fiction can influence reality and reality can influence fiction, sorry this took so long and is so rough, but I got hit with the InspirationTM in the middle of the night lol.
CW:SFW, Price x male reader, monster au,
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At first sight, the feelings you and the good captain had for each other could be considered tense professionalism at best and disdain at worst. It isn't a surprise why that is; the hate and suspicion running between your species is old and deep like the trenches. Dragons hardly want to be a shark's dinner, and a shark would rather not become soup.
Still, the peace between your species held, and so did the tense relationship between you two. To the others it looked like you never agreed; they've lost count how many times you and Price had spent hours arguing over battle plans. How you two would release all the anger you had in the ring, so much so you had to spar outside because the military didn't have the funds to fix the ring after every match. How you would bare your teeth and Price would snarl and growl at you at every little argument, thinly veiled insults flying like bullets out of your mouths.
What they didn't know was how softly Price would purr when you two laid in bed, how gently his claws traced your shark hide along your torso. Sprawled out over your chest like you're his mountain of golden coins, more a cat than a dragon really, Price is the picture perfect example of bliss.
"Comfortable huh?" You hum, carding your clawed fingers through his hair, taking the time to scratch around the base of his horns.
"Mhm," He hums, content blue eyes closing as he leans into your touch. "Finally a moment to ourselves." Price chuckles, nuzzling his head into your neck. He breathes in your scent with a happy sigh, sharp fangs nibbling on your throat, the comforting scent calming his mind.
"Uhuh," You chuckle in turn, "The boys sure know how to keep us on our toes." You grin and your hand slides down from his head to his back, even gentler there as you trace the scar where his wing used to be. His remaining wing stretches out, weakly shaking as if trying to stretch, before it falls back down to lay on the bed and hang off it.
Price shivers, a low sound rumbling from his chest. "Can't leave those muppets alone for a moment." He huffs. "Did you see MacTavish? The lad nearly lost his tail because of his toy." A soft growl slips past his lips, neither of you had been pleased when Soap's tail got caught on fire thanks to his explosive he swore was 'safe'. Price's tail curls around yours, and though your tail is too rigid to do the same, he can still feel you reciprocate in the way your tail tip wags like a dog's.
"He's your problem in the morning." Your words earn you a sharp nip at your throat, more of an admonishment than an actual threat. "Ow." You say, in revenge pinching his pudgy side.
"You deserve it." Price laughs, forked tongue licking up the stray drops of blood that leak down from where his teeth had cut your skin. Placing a hand on your chest Price rises just enough to catch your lips in a slow kiss. You can taste your blood on his tongue, along with cigar smoke and something inherently draconic that makes your mouth water for a bite of his flesh.
But his kisses are enough to quench your hunger, gun calloused hands holding your head still so he can pepper kisses along your brows and down your nose, on each cheek and down your jaw. There's no need to rush when the night is dark and the sun isn't ready to rise yet.
It's peaceful.
The door slams open, light and voices flooding in "Captains we need-" Johnny's voice pitters off as he takes in the sight, bright eyes glowing in the darkness "-you..."
Not so peaceful.
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eveledoze · 9 months ago
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spoilers for ep7 ! things about N and Uzi i wanted to point out 1/? I may sound stupid and naive going into all these details, so I'm sorry
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we all thought that he was looking at Uzi worriedly, but in reality he was shocked because the elevator was broken and because now the path to V was blocked. he's really worried and angry about it (and it's so unusual to see him like that)
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Tessa tells him to look back and at first he looks angry, but then his face softens. for a moment he simply forgot what state Uzi was in cuz he was worried about V (we know that now this Tessa is not exactly Tessa, but I will call her that cuz it’s convenient for me and so as not to get confused)
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Uzi realizes that she has poor control over her powers and bitterly admits that she cannot do anything. she sincerely apologizes and you can hear that she feels guilty from her helplessness + exhausted from pain this short moment honestly killed me- their voice intonations, words and music, it hits so hard (thank you AJ Dispirito! /mega pos) also i find it strange that at first there was no blood, then it appeared cuz of something (even though she doesn’t even have a crack in her visor like Doll) and then the blood disappeared
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but well okay-
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he sincerely apologizes, feeling guilty for his inattention to her well-being, and he comes to comfort her, his body language shows this but Tessa interrupts them
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Tessa calls him to explain to Uzi what's going on (lmao his face)
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he rubs his hands together, which indicates his nervousness, as he realizes that his words will make her more worried and terrified of what they might find out and see, so this will make the situation worse
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you can hear from the tone of Uzi's voice that she is beginning to suspect that they know more than she does, and for some reason they are not telling her this. she seems annoyed at the withholding of information, causing her to lose trust in Tessa and N
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he looks at Tessa as if doubting whether he can be frank in his words, since in essence Tessa is still his boss and he should not contradict her (why does the reflection of his eyes in her spacesuit look funny to me lol)
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he says this in a determined voice, while frowning. the words “we're not gonna hurt you” are addressed to Uzi while N’s gaze and gestures are interpreted as “WE'RE not gonna hurt HER” (while pointing his hand at Uzi) and this is addressing to Tessa. he clearly expresses his position and does not intend to obey Tessa in this in fact (he is rebelling)
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with this "Okay?" he tries to reassure Uzi that they really won't hurt her honestly, the tone of voice with which he said it reminded me a lot of the way he said "we'll ask Tessa, okay?" in ep5, when he addressed Cyn. in both cases, his "Okay?" sounds sincere, kind, letting them know that he will keep his promise
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she is scared and barely audibly says it, losing more trust in them while the fear grows
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Uzi is nervous, she loses control and creates a null, everyone moves back, by the way Tessa takes out her sword
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they repel each other. despite the falling stones, N reaches out to take her hand and pull her towards him
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he takes a step forward, "we'll figure this out, together?.." but she steps back, losing trust in him
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stones fall and block the passage, separating them from each other she closes herself off from him in every sense
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when he woke up, he immediately called her and it sounded quite desperate and creepy cuz of the echo
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N sees that his hand is crushed by stones. with a cold look, he takes out the blade and approache it to the hand, saying that he "deserved this", since he offended Uzi and believes that it would be right if he was punished for it. she experienced pain - he will experience pain, justice
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thewritetofreespeech · 1 month ago
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Could I request Nanami with a scientist s/o who treats and calls her creations her "children" and Nanami is their father now?
Lol Nanami is a plant monster's dad
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At this rate, they were going to miss their reservation.
Nanami looked at his watch again, watching the seconds tick by, as [Y/N] continued to water her plants. “That’s it babies! Drink up!” The plants all seem to move in her direction. Some waving their leaves in adoration towards her, while others made crude gurgling noises towards their ‘mother’.
This was all thanks to [Y/N]’s innate curse technique, Garden of Eden. It allowed her to flow curse energy through any plant or earth material to give it ‘life’. Much like a curse doll. Nanami had seen the technique in action, and what fascinating & terrifying power it could cause. Yet, in most cases, this was what she used her powers for the most.
“If we don’t hurry up we will miss our seating.”
“I’m just finishing up now, Nanami.” [Y/N] told him. “You can’t expect me to go to dinner without feeding our children first.”
“Our children?” He questioned.
“Yes, our children.” [Y/N] confirmed. “I bore them, so you are their father now. Or I guess baby-daddy, since we aren’t married.”
Nanami scoffed. “These are not my children.”
He might have been imagining it, but Nanami was certain that he saw the plants all physically shake and wilt a little on instant. “Don’t say that Nanami!” [Y/N] said. Covering one head hung Venus Flytrap’s ‘ears’. “You’ll hurt their feelings!”
Nanami frowned at [Y/N]’s antics, but knew that if he didn’t apologize, they would never get to dinner. Plus…they all did look a little sad…. “I’m sorry.”
The plants all seem to perk back up a little, and even the Venus Flytrap went back to babbling. “Good! Now just let me finish and we can go.” She watered the last few plants and then came to his side to leave. “Goodbye all! Mommy and Daddy will be back later. :say we’ll be back later Nanami:.” [Y/N] whispered to him before they were out the door.
He rolled his eyes, but still played along, “Mommy and Daddy will be back later.”
He couldn’t be sure of this either, but he thought he heard the plants rustle enthusiastically. Though perhaps he was just still imagining things.
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rightpastnowhere · 3 months ago
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more thoughts on TLOVM season 3 episode 3. still insane.
PART TWO: that TLOVM perc'ahlia scene, mostly in terms of its TLOVM context, with some campaign 1 comparisons
spoilers below the cut for TLOVM AND campaign one moments that will likely happen this season lol
her initiating this fling is fascinating to me. we all know vex has a fear of commitment and being hurt by relationships right? EXCEPT!! except, i think this is her trying to deal with that. which is insane but it makes sense for her in TLOVM. To Me.
cause like. in the first two episodes we have MULTIPLE close calls with percy, which are technically happening all in the same day?? and you have vex, who's admitted to a creepy fey and herself that her heart is not her own, who takes these, processes these, and says, "thinking i lost him even now was awful; if i start a relationship with him, it will only hurt me 100 times worse in the end. so i'll just fuck him casually and pretend i have no emotions about it whatsoever."
which i think can have TWO possible explanations, yknow beyond the way she's afraid of relationships and considering herself a bad omen - explanations that explain why sex is a line she's willing to cross before emotional confession, almost instead of it, whereas in the campaign she won't cross either.
one: she's trying to convince herself that she can just. make it casual. force it into something different, choke the feelings down until they fade away eventually. i don't have as many thoughts on this idea but it DOES bring me insurmountable pain to think about.
two: she's basically struck a bargain with herself.
after two episodes of multiple close calls with percy, it’s almost like she’s trying to wrestle herself into a deal. she looks at her hungry heart which doesn't belong to her anymore, and is terrified of the decision it wants to make, terrified of the idea of a relationship with percy that will one day crumble, and she says, “okay. one thing. we can have one thing. we can have a casual fling, some friends with benefits, we’ll know what it’s like to kiss him and have sex with him and even wake up next to him but that’s it. we’ll pretend we’re asleep in the morning. we’ll distance ourself from him the next day. we’ll pull back, keep enough of a barrier to not let him any closer, but sex can be casual, right? it doesn’t have to mean anything. it won't mean anything. it's casual.”
and even then it’s only “casual” in the sense that they’ve agreed not to say anything about how they feel. they both know how the other feels, they’ve said it in every way you could without explicitly saying i love you. percy downright admits that he feels something and knows there is something between them and he wants emotional connection. vex says that she cares for him, that she can’t say what he wants to hear, and that everyone she’s ever loved, it ends badly - implying, all but directly saying, that he’s one of those people!! she ends up admitting it even more directly than he does!!!! this is so sad it’s almost hilarious. they’re both admitting and committing to the facade of a casual fling. vex because she’s terrified, and percy because he would do anything for her.
she would rather have a facade of a casual relationship, would rather ask percy to help her lie, help her pretend this means nothing, even as she lies there and admits that it does mean something but she's too scared to let it become anything significant. and even that statement, where she refuses to show vulnerability, is showing so much vulnerability. she's trusting percy with this fear she's kept close to her chest, she's trusting percy with her fear of trust. asking percy to hold that fear and keep it safe, hold it close to his chest, right where his heart sits. where her heart sits, now. the amount of trust it takes to do that. the way those words had to be clawed out of her, only when she was lying down, hurt, and couldn't run anymore. she trusts percy with this thing she's only trusted her brother with, if that - and at the same time, she can't even trust herself with loving and being loved without ruining it all.
it’s like. if she doesn’t get too close, it won’t hurt as much when he eventually, inevitably, leaves. whether he dies or walks away or makes a deal with a demon or a death goddess or whatever, he will leave, because they always leave, and the further she is, the less distance she’ll have to fall from. the softer the landing will be.
and then, if this is going the way i think it is, if we are building up to glintshore and the resurrection, then it won’t be soft at all. percy is going to die, and it is going to hurt vex so fucking horribly, and the distance will have meant nothing. all it will do is give her less memories to hold onto, now that he's gone. she will not hurt for the size of the hole in her heart, but rather for the lack of memory she has to fill it. a hole torn further open by the weight of the breadth of love unspent.
and then they're going to try and bring him back. and she will beg for another chance to do it right this time. she will give him her heart and everything she has, because she tried to do the casual distance, and she's learned that it hadn't done anything but hurt the both of them.
but she's not going to make that same mistake again.
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cookiewarriorexpert · 10 months ago
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Memento Vivere, Amongst the Living
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Pokèmon! Shapeshifter! Reader x Sagau Genshin Impact characters
(Archons, Traveller! Aether, Paimon, Wanderer, and Neuvillette)
Sum: The first time Creator! Reader stays in a nation for too long
Whether or not it was the nation that was so closely linked to the Pokémon world’s own Kalos region of where Xerneas resided, which took inspiration from [name]’s real life region of France, it did not matter, for [Name] stayed around in Fontaine for a bit too longer than they usually do to other regions to make sure they didn’t favor nations that could make other nations jealous of the fact that a nation had been favored by the Creator of Teyvat.
But the Xerneas form made them almost gravitate to the Nation of Hydro, and while it made Furina both a bit boastful and also kind of terrified since she was aware of how the Creator never stays in a nation for too long, and her pride turned to a bit of concern since she felt like she did something wrong, or maybe the entire nation at that. And thus, Neuvillette, with Furina’s worried and panicked pleas trying to make it out to be just excitedly boastful and unafraid orders, to call in the Traveller, it sort of escalated to a few unhappy archons, floating food, and of course a knight in the shadows to arrive.
All the while, [name] held not even a hint of confusion, the Xerneas form and the aged wisdom the form gave them made them have no fear, except for a little ounce of displeasure upon seeing the dragons. (Fairy biased against Dragon talking-lol)
Of course, Nahida and Wanderer only watched from the sidelines while everyone was discussing and basically theorizing about why would their Grace would stay in Fontaine. Even comically that [name] was only a few meters away and heard everything, more interested in the French-inspired pastries of the hydro nation, satisfied with the more smaller and cake-like pastries that reminded them of the pokepuffs from the Kalos region from the world of Pokémon.
Eventually, things somehow ended up with Neuvillette getting a bit standoffish with Zhongli, since Zhongli was not technically a dragon and Neuvillette was pretty much not happy about Zhongli being around.
Though Paimon quickly got everyone’s attention when she just hovered over the Creator, gravitating to their soothing, gentle, and all knowing aura, and maybe their Grace was the most patient out of their acolytes since everyone stared at Paimon as if she was a toddler or some ill-mannered child boldly trying to touch or mess with some prized antique or respected figure.
[Name] only flicked their ears, their lips curved slightly to an almost amused look as everyone seemed so worked up about Paimon being so close while Paimon seemed to not even care, as if she was just a buzzed little bee having too much pollen and addicted to the sweet allure of a flower.
“You know I could hear your conversation.” [Name] said, a small subtle smile graced their lips, causing a bit of flustered and a bit of embarrassment to stir up in the group of beings of different origins and nations.
And at that point, Furina, trying to pipe up, finally questioned [Name] in a burst of frustration and nervousness, the entire group was a bit in shock except for Nahida and the Wanderer, knowing well that Furina was overcome with pure frustration from the fear of not knowing why the Creator decided to stay longer.
“Okay I’ll bite!! Why are you here?! Was it just me being a fault?!” Questioned the desperate Furina in a bid of at least getting some satisfaction from the Creator’s answer or at least some scrap of sympathy.
[Name] only looked at Furina, a slight twinge from their ears and turning to Furina that the Hydro Archon quickly realized her mistake and began to bow and apologize profusely, now trying to avoid punishment, but [Name] only sigh, knowing well that they were guilty of making Furina and possibly the entire nation afraid.
“Furina, please stand up, I am not here because of a misgivings of anyone from this nation….” [Name] cooed, soothing a bit of Furina’s doubts, Furina quickly stood up, embarrassed and flustered of acting so immature in front of the other archons and the traveler. Paimon only lay down on the antlers of the Xerneas Hybrid as she took a sigh of relaxation, stirring some bit of jealousy that Paimon was not at least told to back off.
“I am here, simply because Fontaine has given me a sense of…. Home, a place of where I felt most comfortable.” [Name] continued, at first, everyone was silent, before Furina began to swell her chest up in pride, her eyes began sparkled, an unexpected speed of change from her anticipation for her Creator’s answer. Not only did this answer from the Creator cast no doubt that Furina’s nation was favored, but also that [Name] was not at all displeased by anything.
“Oh!- oh- Your Grace! -Why haven’t you told me in the first place?! Oh! Did you hear that Neuvillette?! Fontaine is the most favored nation in their Grace’s- oh thank you thank you thank you!!!” Furina squealed like a child hearing their parents approval, Furina was all over the place, her hands everywhere, as she first hugged Neuvillette and squeezing him as hard as she possibly could in a flurry of emotions and mostly pride, Furina quickly rammed into the Creator and hugging them with as much strength, causing a big shock amongst the small audience, but [Name] only smiled at Furina’s excitement.
Most of the Archons were a bit jealous that their Grace had favor for Fontaine rather than their own nations but they were complicit and not really complaining, Ei gave Furina her respect like Furina had won a duel, Nahida congratulating Furina’s achievement, Zhongli gave his respect, and Venti also gave his approval and was currently thinking of a song.
[Name] only watched on, before going back to indulge in some more of Fontaine’s delicious and delectable desserts and pastries.
And with Furina’s surge of pride and her enlarged ego, Furina and Neuvillette had joined [Name]’s little tea party, with the Archons, Aether, Wanderer, and Paimon as well.
Though Aether was a bit relieved that Paimon was asleep so she wouldn’t cause a problem of hoarding most of the pastries.
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jahayla-parker · 9 months ago
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💭Headcanon: send in a character and a scenario or type of reader to get a bullet point list of thoughts on it.
finnick odair and childhood friends to lover w the reader <3
Ahhh Elll 😭 you want me to do bullet point Headcanons for this? I could do a whole fic on this 😭 he’s so precious and this is so cute
Okay, okay, here we go…
Finnick Odair Childhood Friends to Lovers Headcanons
“You”= reader cause it felt more natural that way lol
Finnick had a crush on you since you guys were little.
He’d always invite you to go with him to the beach in order to spend time together.
You guys would build sandcastles together
And he would help you collect pretty shells, loving the sweet smile it reliably brought to your face
He was the one who taught you how to swim.
Finnick was so proud when you picked it up so easily.
He was always so protective of you and he knew being able to swim would keep you safe
When reality hit, he was always so worried about your and his names being called for the reapings each year
He would always try to calm you before the event, saying how he just knew your names wouldn’t be called; even if he didn’t believe it himself.
His eyes would always look for you in the crowd during the ceremony and let out a breath of relief when you both managed to make it through another reaping.
He found himself being jealous when male classmates showed interest in you
But little did he know, he had no reason to be jealous for you’d developed feelings for him as well
Finnick was always there for you wherever you needed him.
Sometimes it was issues with your family.
Others times it was stress about the fact that the District Four residents training for the games was a daily reminder that you two could be torn apart by the Capitol should one of your names be called in the annual reapings.
Sometimes it was just hormones or other issues.
It didn’t matter, Finnick was always there.
And you were always there for him.
It was perfect.
Finnick debated about telling you his feelings multiple times.
But the sweet boy always panicked.
He loved you too much to risk losing you.
He was fine with the way things were, as long as he was able to have you in his life, things were great.
That is, until his name was called at the young age of 14.
To say you were distraught would be an understatement.
You threw yourself in his arms the moment you were allowed in the visiting room at the city hall after the reaping.
Finnick was trying to be strong for you, but he was of course terrified and he knew you knew him well enough to be able to tell.
You vowed to watch over his family
But Finnick made you also promise to stay safe and to follow any orders from The Peacekeepers who always stayed in town during the duration of the games.
You both exchanged countless other promises and words of support
You made Finnick promise in exchange that he’d win and return to you
Yet, you couldn’t help but feel like you were losing him.
Your fear and heartbreak led you to take a leap you never thought you’d do
You cupped Finnick’s crying face in your shaking hands and told him that you loved him.
You nervously confessed that you didn’t mean as just friends.
You felt bad for telling him this now.
But Finnick had to know. Should something happen, he had to know that he was loved.
As you began to apologize for the timing but explain yourself, Finnick cried and whispered to you that he loved you too
You two shared a short but passionate kiss just before the Peacekeepers entered to take him away.
You screamed and fought against the officers as they pulled the boy away
But with one pleading look from Finnick, you stopped and sniffled as you watched him be lead out of the room, away from you.
The games were excruciating.
For both of you
Finnick hated what he had to do in the arena
But he was motivated to make it back to you.
To keep his promise to you that he’d return
To be able to finish what had finally started between you two after his reaping
You were devastated as you watched your sweet boy suffer
You never watched the games before.
And you absolutely hated watching these games
Yet you couldn’t take your eyes off of the screen
Day and night you could be found watching the screen
Searching for Finnick and watching over him as he sleep
As if you could somehow keep him safe from this far away
Your heart broke for him each time you watched his reactions to having to take the life of another victor.
You were astonished and confused by the gifting of the trident from a Capitol resident.
You knew no one had gotten such an extravagant or deadly gift during the games before
You were relieved in that it would help keep Finnick safe
But there was this sensation that something was off, wrong, and you couldn’t shake it.
When Finnick won the games, you were balling your eyes out
You foolishly ran to the train station to wait for him the moment the games ended, unable to wait patiently
Only for your and Finnick’s loved ones to remind you that he would have to be paraded around The Capitol and the other Districts for a bit first
But you were still tempted to stay there until you saw him get off the train
Until you knew your eyes didn’t deceive you
Until you knew he was alive and safe (little did you know what was about to happen to poor 14yr old Finnick)
But you recalled your promise to him that you’d be safe, and staying alone at the train station for days on end wouldn’t be fulfilling that promise
When it was time for him to return, you were there bright and early.
The moment he stepped off the train, his eyes were on you.
Little did you know he had been looking through the window for you the moment the train pulled into the station
But, he wouldn’t let you show your feelings to him right now.
He’d already been confronted by Snow
He wasn’t going to take any risks when it came to your safety.
Even if that meant he had to break your heart by being distant
It was made a tiny bit easier by his shame of what he’d done during the game, he knew he wasn’t the same boy you’d fallen for and he worried you’d change your mind after knowing what he’d done in the games
Even if you hadn’t, you would if you found out what he now had to do
But he couldn’t tell you
He couldn’t stand to see you fall out of love with him
Couldn’t risk you finding him as disgusting as he now felt
And he couldn’t risk telling you his situation knowing that Snow told him to keep it a secret
But if he allowed you to embrace him and hold him right now, the way he wanted, needed, he knew Snow could and would use it against him.
If he ever even accidentally stepped out of line, he knew Snow would use you to punish him
So as much as it broke his heart to see the confusion and look of heartbroken rejection in your eyes, he continued to subtly shake his head at you as he walked through the crowd that had gathered to see his return
You watched in despair as everyone fawned over Finnick.
You could see the pain in his eyes
But you seemed to be the only one who noticed it
Everyone else saw him as the proud shiny new victor, even his own mother. (A/n: his dad is said to be deceased in his wiki but his mom is still listed as alive but that’s all unclear)
But it didn’t matter that you saw the actual hurt because he hadn’t let you even approach him.
You were too heartbroken to even be angry
You’d been so worried about him and couldn’t wait to see him again
Yet it felt like he’d forgotten everything that happened before he’d left
And you felt guilty for even being upset by that
After all, he’d just gone through hell in the games
Of course he had other things on his mind
But you couldn’t help but be heartbroken about the dynamics of his return
After all, even if you’d not kissed him and confessed your love to each other, he was still your best friend
Or at least he had been when he’d left
And yet now he didn’t seem to want you around.
Yet you stayed, unable to part from him even if you couldn’t actually be close to him
After a few hours of sulking as you stayed off to the side as Finnick met with various District Four residents, including plenty of girls who suddenly were batting their eyes at him, you pulled yourself together and left
Finnick felt like the worst person in the world
Especially seeing your face whenever he had to pretend he was interested in the girls who kept approaching him
When he was finally allowed to go to his new home in Victor’s Village, he snuck away to find you
He went to your house, only to find you weren’t there
He instantly began to worry that he messed up somehow and Snow had already followed through on his threats
So he ran, literally ran, to the one place he thought you might be
And he practically collapsed in relief when he found you sitting there, staring out at the rough waves
Finnick had approached you that night
And while you were still upset about earlier, you couldn’t help but pull him into your arms as you both cried.
You didn’t have it in you to talk about the elephant in the room, not wanting to hear him tell you he’d realized there were far better girls he could be with and no longer wanted to be with you
But Finnick’s guilt was eating at him.
You’d stayed the night, at Finnick’s request, the just night only to wake up to him having nightmares.
As such, you’d been staying with him each night since he got back, holding him and comforting him through the aftermath of the games
And while he cherished the support, it made him feel even more guilty about his secret and about not explaining himself
But he selfishly couldn’t risk losing your support so he kept it in
That is, until one day he’d returned from a trip to The Capitol and didn’t see you in his new home
He ran the length of the coast trying to find you
He’d reluctantly returned to his house in Victor’s village that night and broke down in tears as his eyes landed on your sleeping frame as you rested on his couch
Upon hearing his sobs, you woke up and practically flung your half-awake body over the edge of the couch to get to him.
You had known something was going on. You knew him too well. And you knew that other victors didn’t return to the Capitol as frequently as he did. And you knew he wasn’t quite himself whenever he’d get back. You knew it took a few days for your Finnick to return. Even after he’d work through a lot of the aftermath of the games. But after no answer the few times you’d asked, you decided not to press.
But you couldn’t take that route anymore. Not when he was sobbing in your arms and holding onto you like his life depended on it.
After a lot of supportive encouragement, Finnick finally explained what Snow had forced him into.
You were downright livid.
Finnick felt horrible and couldn’t stop apologizing for what he’d done
You had reassured him for hours on end that you weren’t upset, mad, hurt, disappointed, disgusted, or any of other self-deprecating thoughts he’d feared you were feeling towards him.
It had taken a long time and lots of conversations for you two to figure out how to move forward
You wanted to go after Snow and it took everything in Finnick to convince you not to.
Meanwhile, Finnick worried he wasn’t worthy of being with you because of what he was having to do, and it took everything in you to convince him that it didn’t change how you saw him and that should he want a relationship, it didn’t mean he would be being disloyal to you
It took some time, but things slowly began to return to normal… or, closer to the way they were before his reaping, apart from that you were now officially together
Finnick kept the change in dynamics of your relationship as private as possible so Snow wouldn’t realize you became more than close friends.
But he was still the sweetest boyfriend ever
There were undoubtedly hard times wherever he had to leave
And he felt so guilty and disgusting when he returned
But with your help, he was able to feel like himself again each time
I could keep going but there’s a million different ways I could take it and it would be more of a fic at that point haha so I’ll conclude it there 💙
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